Thursday

cyber bullies

cyberbullies
i often get emails from people wantin' to turn their hobbies into businesses of some sort on the world wide web. they always say, 'dear mo, i wanna turn my hobby into business on the world wide web. could you please give me some advice on how to get people to be interested in my__________ (the blank is filled with anything from hats made outta clorex bottles to macrame plant holders that double as a place to poke the t.v. remote).'

while i have accidently turned designin' digital doo dads for delivery via download into a successful enterprise, i admit i am not the right person to help someone else do the same for their own adventure into cyberspace money makin'. if it wasn't for paypal combined with help from my dear friend inspire company amy, i would'a been plum outta luck when my doo dads became homeless a few years ago. plus seein' as how i don't make my livin' off of the doo dads, i tend to do things a lil differently than someone who might need to feed their family or pay the rent off what they ring up in sales from those who travel from cyber shop to cyber shop lookin' for things they can't find out in the real world.

one thing i do tell 'em is that they need to watch out for the groups o' women who hang out in packs known as cyber bullies. this is a mean group o' women and when crossed....even slightly...they'll go to their keyboards in mass and with a mob mentality, tap out the meanest things possible about you. no way can their words be confused with what would be contructive criticism! they don't care whether they know a damn thing about you or your business - fact checkin' is not somethin' they concern their mean ol' selves with. they just get goin' on those keyboards and don't stop until either an alert is sent out that some other poor soul needs a good bashin' or whoever is in charge o' the free-for-all-type-o-forum they are doin' their bashin' in decides the mob has gone a bit too far and closes the bash down.....but of course they don't remove the unkind words - otherwise the mob might turn on THEM. plus, the more posts they have, the more they can charge for advertisin' so it doesn't make good sense for 10 or so bashin' pages to be jerked off their postin' place (except of course if the bashin' has taken place at two peas ....those people there are quite responsible and don't take kindly to their members bashin' someone around and usually pull the mean ol' words from view as soon as they become aware of 'em).

the bashins' that have been held in my honor have been pretty bad. there was one just about a year ago that was quite a whopper. i knew somethin' was up cause once again my mailbox was filled to the brim with people registerin' to become members o' my private sites. i never read the things but my friends and moland neighbors do and from what i understand, the pack o' cyber bullies participatin' reached new heights o' mean.

i did my best to put it outta my mind...this is hard when you know people are sayin' things about you that are untrue or unkind or both....even if you don't know who they are. anyway, i went on puttin' it outta my mind until my mini somehow came upon this vicious ol' thread revolvin' all around her dear mother. i do believe it is the most upset my child has ever been. i'm not sure if she was more upset that such horrible things were bein' said about her beloved mother or the realization that grown women could be so mean. she kept askin' me what these women would do if they discovered one o' their children bashin' a schoolmate on the world wide web....and why would they be settin' such a bad example for them. one woman in particular really bothered her...her mean ol' words were followed by a picture of her kids and somethin' about her son bein' autistic and how people should be kind to each other.

yes - i tell the people who write to me for advice that they need to be aware that things like this can happen to 'em. especially cause they may not be as fortunate as i've been....with the exception o' poor mini discoverin' that grown women can indeed be meaner than the meanest girl in school, my friends and neighbors havin' a hard time sittin' on their hands cause i always ask 'em not to involve themselves in the melee no matter how much they want to defend my honor and me workin' hard not to take it all personally, the cyber bullies comin' out in force against me is always a boon for the doo dad'n business. seems the minute half o' those women hit the button to get their post up and eternally on the screen, they send me an email askin' how they can register.

one thing i know for sure - never ever read any bashin' held in your honor and never ever participate in 'em thinkin' you can get the bullies to look at things differently. they are bullies afterall and you usually can't tell a mean ol' bully anything....just let 'em entertain themselves at your expense....if they had somethin' more productive to do they'd probably be doin' it . you just gotta feel kinda sorry for 'em....i'm sure their moms forgot to teach 'em how to do unto others.....

i do so hope you are not doin' any bashin' or gettin bashed this fine valentine's day and instead are celebratin' with lots o' kissin' and huggin'. i'm attachin' a picture of a recent gatherin' o' the cyber bullies jo took. she attempted to infiltrate one of their meetins' recently but her big hair was recognized right away and she barely got away in one tube topped piece.

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness Jo made it out safe and sound. From what I've seen from time to time those girls really get themselves into a frenzy trying to outdo each other with their levels of nasty. A shocking thing for young mini to see grown women behaving so badly while masquerading as the creme de la creme of the digital world.

We so appreciate our little community in Moland where we can be positive and supportive of one another without fear of being the prey du jour.

Thank goodness you're thick-skinned and wise beyond your 29 years Mo -- it's so much more fun here on the kind side of the street.

xoxoox
Tracy

Maija said...

You are so wise, Mo! I have a few friends who have been devastated by those cyber bullies!
I can't wait for the time I meet you in person!

Anonymous said...

Glad Jo made it out and that she didn't get sacked with tomatoes or anything.. great post Mo re the bullies.. xo Christa

Jan, aka Milly and someday I'll be either Daisy or Nana Sugar said...

they are just jealous of your god given talent, mo, but that's no excuse for them acting like this! women can be far more brutal than men when they get those claws out. hold your head high, they can't touch you...

and tell mini not to fret her pretty little head one whit about this, she has the sweetest mama in the world.

xoxoxo

jan

Anonymous said...

Thank you Mo for speaking out and putting those mean spirited, green eyed bullies in their place. There is no excuse for that kind of juvenile behavior.

I have sat on my hands for so long now that I think I might have done them permanent damage so now I just make it a practice not to visit those forums at all...I also make it a point to never buy from designers who make it a practice to bad mouth others in an effort to make themselves feel better.

I love the Moland community for the very reason that every one who is there shares not only a love of digital scrapping, but they are also kind, positive,respectful of others and are always willing to share their knowledge and talents.

I'm sorry that Mini had to experience the nastiness first hand...please assure her that there are many more of us than there are of them.
xoxo
JudyG

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened. It's all very easy for them to throw stones when they remain anonymous. I chalk it up to their jealousy, in part, & who knows what else?!? The "pack mentality!" It pains me to read that your dear mini stumbles upon these things, & of course, it hurts her feelings, too.

Take care, knowing that there are many who support you,
betty

Anonymous said...

It is sad that these women say the things they say in public forums where your duaghter can see them. I am sure if it were reversed and you were the one talking about their character and their kids could see it, they would not be up on the soap box screaming about fair speech.

xoxoxox
Peggy

Anonymous said...

In the aftermath of the recent college shootings any type of bullying, mudslinging, and downright meanness towards another human being makes my skin crawl. What is wrong with a little kindness?!

The world of art/scrapbooking should be made up of kind, generous, loving people willing to show their talents for the rest of us to share. I believe for the most part, it is. This community of Moland is a light hearted place to be. I needed that today after the tragedy too close to home yesterday. The few "trolls" that insist on bringing with them hateful words that would upset a small child as well as a grown woman should be ashamed of themselves. There is no room here for thievery or trickery. As Dorothy said in Oz, "Be gone before someone drops a house on you!"

The world is small and we are so fragile. Please love one another. - Kathy

Heidi said...

sigh...

Mo, we love you. I am so sorry to hear your name being brought up in such a manner, yet again. In the words of my father..opinions are like a-holes, every one has one. ( my father adds that some are just bigger and smell worse.)
For me, I only know you to be kind and generous to a fault. You rock my world with your art. I don't know a lot, but in my opinion you are amazing!

xxoo

Anonymous said...

well, i personally haven't seen any o this bullyin (thank heavens) cuz the minute i found Moland, my roamin shoes stopped wanderin. HOWEVER, i can't believe that grown women (i guess they are all the female variety) would stoop so low and be so cruel and offensive, especially in a place where our precious minis can read the slanderous words. FORTUNATELY, since i rarely leave Moland, i'm surrounded by wonderful friends, an extremely benevolent and talented Mayor, and all the kind words and graciousness my heart desires. thank goodness for my Moland sisters (and i do believe one honorary brother). lots o hugs, lisar

Michelle said...

Happy Heart Day, Mo - I hope it went as well as mine did.

Michelle (birthday twin)

Missy Gail said...

Gees...when will it end? I just don't 'get it'. Why do people bully? I'm sure that if they or their children were on the receiving end that they wouldn't like it very much. There's so much crap going on in the world that you'd think that everyone would have had their fill of it by reading the paper or watching the news on tv. I don't 'do' any other forums other than Moland and reading about the evil that's going on out there sure makes me glad that I don't. Moland is a safe, happy and fun place for us and I'm very thankful for that. My time visiting Moland seems to eliminate all the badness in the world and restores my faith that there are good people out there.

I think that these gals should just mind their own beeswax (a childish saying but one which I know that these childish people will understand) and get on with doing good things. Do they forget that one day (maybe more) when they get old that they'll have lots of time to reflect on all the goo(?) and bad that they've done in their lives? I sure wouldn't want to be in their shoes! But then again...I don't imagine that people like this have a conscience.

Love ya Mo...make like a duck and let it all roll off of your back. Quack, quack you bad girls.

Anonymous said...

I just find all of this so sad. We're all in this for pretty much the same reason...to create something beautiful and memorable for our families. If we're lucky we and find a special place like Moland we get to meet some really amazing women along the way. It just doesn't seem right that there has to be so much grief surrounding something like this. Mo please remember, your friends truly appreciate everything you have done to make Moland such a happy place. Don't concern yourself with all of this nonsense. Big hugs to you and to Mini!

Kelly

Anonymous said...

Dear Mo,

There is only one word for people who act this way and it is this: SENSELESS!

These people who think it is meaningful (it is not by the way) to go around spreading vicious and nasty lies about others (such as you, Mo) that are entirely false and undocumented, have obviously not been trained properly in regards to etiquette. And I don’t feel I even need to mention that they are so insanely jealous of you and your amazing artwork. That is a GIVEN! 

As long ago as it may seem, people used to live by the golden rule of “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!” These women (a.k.a. Cyberbullies) obviously have NO intention of living by this rule and in fact, do quite the opposite, because they think that if they can hurt and bruise someone else’s reputation, they in turn make themselves look better and come out of the whole ordeal smelling like a peach!

REALITY CHECK CYBER BULLIES: By spreading malicious lies about someone you know nothing (or very little about) is asinine! Especially those of you who wish to “remain anonymous..” You know who you are… At least if you feel so strongly about what you have to say, have enough B *LLS to put your name on the post! What a bunch of sad, pitiful, scared chickens (or shall I say “Sheep!”)

I am so sorry that you have to deal with these horrible, “attention-deprived” women. You yourself, Mo, are a woman of class and are highly regarded by all of us here in this fabulous community you have created and shared for us and with us. I can imagine how frustrating it would be for me to come home and read such hurtful comments about my own loving, mother, I am sorry that Mini had to see this.

We all stand behind you Mo, 100%! Don’t let these scumbags get you down…. This is exactly what they want. Keep your head up, dear! The day will come when their rude, hurtful comments they posted are gonna bite ‘em right back in their behinds!

Always a fan…...Rebecca (sassy251)

Anonymous said...

I wrote something the other day, and feel compelled to add a little bit more. I cannot believe that grown women do this...I am so sorry Mini stumbled upon these bits of stuff being said about you which are all untrue. I enjoy the happy place here that you created, and thank you for a safe and secure place for us to show our pages made with your wonderful art. I am sorry that they (cyber bullies) continue to attack you in malicious ways. No wonder the world is the way it is..people poking at others and then needing to feed on it. Those that write that stuff should be ashamed of themselves. I know it hurts to read those things.. I am just glad that you are the person you are.. I truthfully don't know how they all can look at themselves in the mirror... your art is wonderful Mo and we love you. XO Christa

Anonymous said...

I don't really do much wondering outside Moland in search of a good image--a little here a little there. That is by choice. There is no better site, no better images, no better folks than those found in Moland. I actually feel sorry for those who have the desire and time to sit and waste on spreading hatred. These are probably the same folks we felt sorry for in school who had to lie their way through for some unknown reason. In contrary, I don't feel sorry for you Mo. You are blessed and always will be. xoxo Rosemary

Anonymous said...

Well I must admit I am totally clueless about what goes on elsewhere and quite frankly I don't want to know.

Moland is a home away from home..... a community full of wonderful, talented, caring friends, inspiring art and the best doo dads on the planet. All of which would not be..... if it were not for our dear Missy Mo.

I'm really sadened when I hear of all this rubbish going on. From experience the best place for rubbish is in the bin with the lid on tight. (The smell of rotting garbage is not always pleasant.)

Roses and chocolates on Valentines day...now there are some sweet smells to put a smile on your face. Hope you got heaps of both dear Mo.

Hugs always xxox Deb

Tracy said...

i was visiting some places i enjoyed and haven't been to lately and i said hey let me go visit moland. last tiem i visited - gosh it musta been a year or so ago (i've been busy) and these goins on were goin on ... it is sad isn't it? you just hang in there - it is sad they never learned my mothers rule "if you haven't got anything nice to say dont say it at all" :-)

Anonymous said...

OK...i read the nonsense. i LOVE to LAUGH @ those kinds of threads b/c most of the girls think it is your doing mo! very funny! i was really disgusted at first by the owner's comment but she quickly redeemed herself.
there are tons of junk talkin blogs/forums out there, how tacky to allow it at a place that hubs for the digicommunity though. i think it's a misrepresentation of women that scrapbook EVERYWHERE. i also think the freedom of speech card is sooooooooo played out.
i applaud you mo on how you're handling this. you are truly the definition of a lady!

--mini, please please please know that there are bitter women out there who are just miserable, that can't simply ENJOY such a rewarding hobby b/c there isn't enough controversy. but don't worry dear girl. your mama is well and your family is well. be happy together and no one else will matter!
XxOo -- Monet (smsjd411)

Stephanie said...

Well, well, well...they're at it again?! As I say everytime, don't they have anything better to do...like SCRAPBOOK???

It's always the same jealous meanies who chime in (one of which was a designer I used to buy from who tries to come across usually as a sweetie-two-shoes...NOT). And, if someone else started a thread about her - or any one of the resident bullies, and joked about bringing popcorn and drinks, etc., they would rally their petty back stabbing troops to revolt and scream from the mountain tops about how unjustified and rude and unfair. And, God forbid, if one of their children were exposed to even a fraction of the meanness they dish out...they'd probably threaten to sue and become completely unhinged (which I think for the most part they already are!)!

All I can say is it disgusts and infuriates me each time and it takes a heck of a lot of will power not to respond to their bullying ways. I even registered to the free for all posting place this time, but have thus far decided to take the higher road.

All I know is that each time these untalented, mean spirited, immature jerks do this it costs them money. I know I for one will NEVER buy anything from them now or ever...besides once you've had the BEST from MO, who needs the rest?????

xoxoxo

Stephanie
(stephmsu)

Anonymous said...

Once...and only once...did I stumble upon some of the meanies. I have to admit, I was shocked...I would've never ever thought that grown women would've been capable of saying such things. Mean girls in high school, yes...but not grown up women. That said, I crawled back under my rock, and there I'll stay...very happily!!

(sorry mini had to stumble on it too...)

Debra

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry they are up to it again. Its unconscionable. ((hugs))

Michelle (aka Michellesmyname) said...

Mo, you covered almost everything I've ever wanted to say. It is pathetic when grown women choose to act like this. I would suspect they conduct their entire lives in this manner. These people are an embarrassment to women, mothers, business women, and hobbyists.

Since many of these individuals consider themselves business women, I would like to take this opportunity to point out what should be obvious. Mo's regular members are also customers of other digital graphic sites. We see your ill behavior, we know who you are, and we are offended. When you and your CT members participate in, and help escalate negative threads, the end result is a reduction to your own customer base. There are seven designers that I completely boycott because they or their “team” have engaged in behavior unbecoming. Since I spend quite a bit on digital supplies, that equals big losses for you. So keep that in mind the next time you feel like “jumping” someone.

Beth said...

Hi Mo,
I am so new to all of this, that I have yet to even make a scrap book.(i have tons of supplies, though) However, my search for knowledge & beauty has lead me to your sites.
I love any and all things that are creative and pretty... and what you do amazes me.
I hate to hear that all of this ugliness goes on elsewhere and especially about you.
So, since i've joined moland, i hope i can learn & make pretty things... and i want to say "Thank You" for making such a special place available.
HUGS...
beth

Anonymous said...

Dear Mo, those meanies aren't worth your little finger. Besides, aren't we all doing this for fun? It doesn't appear that they know that--they are even mean to EACH OTHER!

ejj

robinbird said...

gosh you have such wonderful and loyal friends mo. i hope you feel our love and support from the tippy top of your head to your tippy toes. hang in there sweetie!
XOXOXOX

Anonymous said...

Gad, will this never end? I am one of those fans who sits on my hands and resists the desire to punch the cyber bullies on the their digital noses.

I am sorry that you have ever had to experience this ugliness, and even sorrier that your child was exposed to it. You are a classy lady Mo Jackson. All of us in Moland love you and your art. We've got your back and will never forget all that you do for us.

xoxoxoxo
Sandy Miller

Oriana said...

Ohh MO, I loooooove this post.... I'm lauging sooo hard cuz I know all what you said is true. I have to admit I'm not a regular to the store and I ran into your designs through one of this "bashing" threads (so, not everything is bad). I've only bought your designs once (during the period the doo dat shop was open to public) but I do like your stuff and think you are pretty funny (I do read your blog often). Keep doing the things you do girl... And I hope someday you let me in to Molad, I'm sure it will be a blast... hehehe

Hugs from Central America

Oriana

Debra said...

Hi Mo,

The reason the occasional "MO" threads at DST get so big is people feel excluded. A lot of them have been banned from your site for no apparent reason at all, which creates a feeling of hurt and resentment. People deal with it by joking. Most of the posts on the "MO" threads don't even have anything to do with you. The last one turned into a running joke about 'smurfs'...

But I think everyone respects the quality of your work and your choice to offer your products in a controlled environment. As the community become more aware of piracy and other unsavory activities I think it helps people understand why you would want to carefully screen members who have access to your site.

Respectfully,

Debra
Small potatos designer

Meredith said...

Hi Mo! I am not a regular here, although I do check the blog pretty frequently. I wanted to come here and let you know that not everyone over at that site condones negative behavior. There are a few of us who are responsible adults. I just wanted to take a minute and let you know that if I had money to spend on digi supplies, I'd be bangin' on your doo dad shop door and beggin' to come in! I, too, boycott several of the "sweet" designers that like to put on a nice face until it comes time for a good old bashin' thread. It makes me sick. And I told them as much in my post there. I am so incredibly sorry that mini had to see those threads. I can't even imagine how that must have made her and you feel. If she ever stumbles on one again, I hope she can see that at least one or two of us stick up for you and don't condone the bad behavior of those other nasty women. I'll probably be blacklisted over there forever but that's fine with me! :) I'll go away now. :) Hope you had a good Valentine's Day!

TJ said...

It's a sad world where grown-ups can hurt others with senseless words, especially children.

I also boycott those designers who have no qualms about joining in on the bashing or supporting dishonest people.

I love your doodads and need to figure out how to get back into the site because it doesn't seem to like my password any longer (or this old long tooth isn't inputting it right).

kpollinger said...

Mo,
I'm so sorry that this stuff continues. I don't know why there has to be an us vs. them mentality and I know you aren't the only one to get hit by it, but you pursue a different "model" for your business that seems to make you a target.

I've enjoyed MANY fine purchases from your lil doo dad shop. I'm sad its closed but I respect your choices.

Please tell Mini that no all of us grow up to atttack others. I'm so impressed with your response to it all.

Cheryl said...

I don't even know you, but this stuff hurts my heart, perhaps because there are so many of them and just one of you? altho from reading the other comments here it looks like you have lots of cyber friends who love and appreciate you! I really hate it that your dear daughter had to read some of the ugly stuff from the bullies. But somehow I know that her wise and wonderful Mother helped her to understand that with all the ugliness in the world there is still so much that is good and beautiful. God bless you Mo!

Beth said...

Mo, I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you. I remember what it was like to be treated badly by the "mean girls" in high school, and even two decades later it still smarts. I'm glad you're taking the high road in this situation even though it's difficult. Can me tell you while I have your attention that I've been trying for weeks now to log on to your website but when I enter the URL I just get a blank page. Am I doing something wrong? Or if anyone else knows PLEASE write and tell me. Thanks Mo and hang in there! Beth

Anonymous said...

The threads at these places.. one large one in particular horrify me. I am always saddened that a group of women.. apparently hoping to share their love and memories with their families are SO rude, arrogant, would bullying others, attempt to bring down designers and assassinate characters.

I hear that the designer threads (not open to everyone) are even meaner... nastier and down right pathetic. I for one am sorry you have once again suffered at their hands. How cruel and unkind they can be.

At least their administrator steps in at the last minute and fans the flames and does her usual rhetoric about respect and fairness.

Patricia said...

Ok, I'm not a complete novice at all this but it seems like you have really been burned by some bad people. I found out about you from a thread in DD about your boxers and have searched a long time to find you. I just want to buy the boxes. I've registered for the store and hope to be able to get them soon.

BUT I have also found this cool site of good deep weirdness. Happy for me.

Saucy said...

Dear Mo,

I firmly believe that those meanies don't have much goin' on in their lives. I had no idea they'd reared their nasty heads again. My Valentine's Day was spent so far away from Moland, meetin' up with special doctors in fancy suits, hopin' to get me up and at'em and back to Moland again for my usual shenanigans. Obviously, these women don't have many pressing issues to occupy their time.

The worst part of all is that little Mini had to be exposed to it all... shameful. My Loopy has met the mean girls at school this year. I know it's not the right way to deal with it, but a few times, I've kept her home with me for a day of foot-soaking and fingernail painting, just to take the edge off. You might have to go for a manicure to shake it off, Mo.

Love
Miss Saucy