...well...for the most part anyway. there were other minor reasons i have been unbloggable for so long but for the most part steve jobs is to blame. see - he has been spendin' way too much time workin' on that ipod thing and tinkerin' with some sort o' televison doo dad when he needs to get back to work on some of his earlier inventions. i tried telephonin' him to discuss the mishaps and mayhem making me mad at most all machines mac most of the month o' march but as you may be musin', it was meaningless motion on my part.
we have plenty o' rooms here on the doo dad property and there's at least one mac in each of em. then in the guest house mini has a mac museum - a room filled with one o' each mac ever made from the very beginnin' - all in workin' order. and of course there's that secret mac graveyard i wrote about here on the blog just about two years ago - the place mini and i hide all the macs we have accidently mortally wounded in one way or another. addin' all those macs up together i would venture to guess we are some o' macs best customers and most frequent buyers - among regular sorta folks. so with all the problems i have had of late i was thinking, if it's hard for me to get mac-satisfied when i have a mac-problem, i wonder how frustrated some one-mac-family might get when encounterin' the same mishaps and mayhem i'm 'bout to mention.
i must explain why even tho i am surrounded by macs i have been unable to blog. for some reason i can only do any readin' and writin' on my personal laptop while sittin' on the shabby couch in the doo dad den. i can do everything else on the other macs but it's on the couch with my own laptop that i am able to whirl in the wonderful web world.
too bad the term wireless was never meant to apply to mac-users who dabble in designs upwards of a whole gig each and who stockpile large quantities o' doo dads in the works and hunderds o' finished sets stored away. all these wires make me nuts. that's not really part o the recent mayhem but that lil white t-shaped thing is. it's supposed to enable the mac-chine to connect to the airport and therefore communicate with the other computers in the family and the whole world wide web. in my opinion, havin' paid for about a dozen or so now, it deserves an award for the dinkiest - and maybe dumbest - designed vital piece o' equipment ever made. it just sort of 'pokes' into the hole. it doesn't really 'screw' in or 'snap' in....just sort of 'sits'. as you can see...my latest batch is unable to 'sit' unassisted anymore. one is clingin' to life with the help of heavy duty tape and the other - out of desperation i hot glued it to it's surroundings.
then there's the power cord. these things cost around 60 or 70 dollars each and i have yet to get my money's worth. no matter how careful i am, in no time the plastic casing breaks open to expose teeny wires that will shock you and your lil dog and shortly after that, the teeny wires break in two and the whole thing has to be replaced. sure - those mac-men will replace it for you if you purchased 'apple care'...but durin' the time you are sending the broken one to em and waitin' for the new one, whatta ya supposed to do? you did as they said to do and put your whole life on the mac-chine and now you can't even get juiced up and into your mac-life. no way mr. mac-steve was around to approve the newest version of power cord - the one that saves your life and mac-chine if you trip on it - cause it's mac-horrible. it's impossible to keep attached and teeny wires were showing and it had to be replaced after only two weeks. i think i preferred trippin'.
my last two issues are more mac-maddenin'. i was quite happy with the laptop i was usin' for readin' and writin' when mini's daddy pitched one o the newest intell versions into the doo dad den. from the moment i turned it on half the screen was full o blinkin and flashin' lines. it was quite frustratin' as up to that point i was used to having access to a whole screen. i was certain the mac-men would replace it if mini's daddy took it back. much to my surprise that was not the case. seems to get the proper assistance mini's daddy had to make an appointment with the store mac-wizard. this person was quite busy and the appointment couldn't take place for quite a few days. when the audience with the wizard was granted, mini's daddy was grilled on the situation and the mac-chine was looked over carefully and notes were made on the couple o lil scratches it contained. it was then sent away for almost two weeks to be fixed. as annoyed as this made me i couldn't help wonder how annoyed i would be if i had scrimped and saved to obtain the thing and then immediately had to give it back and be without it while mr. mac-steve (who by the way has never trained his underlings in the ways o' good customer relations....like tellin' them to at least convey some sympathy for your temporary loss or such) kept my saved and scrimped mac-money. although i was unable to do my readin' or writin' durin' the repairin' time, at least i had more macs i could do other things on. how mac-mad i would be if this wasn't the case.
when mini's daddy picked up the brand new once half-screened mac-chine, he noticed the closure area was slightly damaged. he asked that a notation be made about it but was told this wasn't possible. this made him really mac-mad and after he spent a whole day on the phone, it was made possible. sadly - and madly - in no time, half the screen started actin' up again. just when i was ready to pitch the new machine into the secret graveyard and yank my most recently retired laptop back from jo, mini figured out that if i attached a clothespin to a certain place on the side i could get the whole screen to appear without lines and blinkin'. but right after figurin' that out, i could no longer get the arrow to move or the clicker to click. and the whole thing was so hot if it was any where near my lap i was sweatin' like a pig. i had just bout had it with my fancy intell mac-machine. right before i decided to hurl it out the window i noticed the battery was all swollen and bulgin' and some white gel lookin' stuff appeared ready to ooze out. mini's daddy called to inquire about the bulge and was told it was what you would call an explodin' battery and that this was the first they had heard of the condition occurrin' on one o the new macs. we were instructed to send the battery and it's bulge to them right away and if we would provide a credit card number they would be happy to send me a new one. once they recieved the explodin one they would refund the money.
i now have the new battery - although it woulda been nice if it had arrived with some sort of apology or even one o those apple decals - and as long as i keep the clothespin in the right place, i am now up and runnin' - able to read and write and blog again. i am even gettin' used to the pain o the clothespin flippin' off and smackin' me in the face. i will remain annoyed that it's gotten to the point where the mac-makers can get away with just about anything nowadays. i hafta put up with situations and a lack o' customer service i would never tolerate from any other business. yes...i feel as if there's a macopoly and i have an addiction for mac-chines that could never be filled by that other machine. unfortunately i fear mr. mac-steve knows this about us mac-users and because he does, i may never have the pleasure of bein' greeted with a smilin' cheerful 'hello' or 'welcome' or 'how can i help you' or even the always appreciated 'thank you so much for shopping with us' when visitin' one o his bright white stores or an apology when i am forced to do without my chosen machine thru no fault o' my own. and if mac t.v. is even an iota as successful as the ipod has been - well - i'm sure my addiction for all things mac will be even less appreciated. hopefully along the way mr. mac.steve will at least do somethin about that t-shaped vital piece o equipment .
a big moland thanks to all o you who have inquired as to my whereabouts. i apologize to anyone whose email may have gone unanswered durin' my mac-misadventures. i have once again fallen woefully behind in my duties and am gonna set about tryin' to catch up right away and will do my best to make you forgive me. i'm givin' the intell mac-chine one more chance.
